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Delete her number.

Stop ringing her. Stop messaging her. Stop making excuses to see her, to drop by her place.

Erase her name from memory. Remove yourself from her life, more completely than you would like but as completely as she deserves. Move on, so that you can allow her to also move on. When you close your eyes, you don’t get to see her face. Not anymore. You don’t get to think about her lips, the warm glow of her skin when she rests next to you, or how she squeezes your hand in her sleep. You are not allowed to remember the smell of her perfume, that she only drinks mint tea (with two dollops of honey), or that she loves you.

She loves you.

She has been in love with you for too long.

So, forget how she says your name. Forget how she calls your name. Forget how she screams your name. Forget that time you got sick and she stayed up with you all night, letting you lay your head in her lap and holding a cold compress to your forehead. Forget how her hair feels in your fingers. Forget how she looks in your sweatshirts.

Forget her.

Know only that she existed at one point in your life, but relinquish all hope that she could exist at another point — sometime in the future that you are unwilling to specify because you don’t know what you want. Yet. It is not fair for you to swoop in and out of her life as you choose. It is not fair for you to say that you are satisfied with “things as they are” and you will have time to “figure it out” later. Let her stop investing emotionally in you. Let her pour that love and care into the people who deserve her.

Don’t tell her that you think about her all the time. Don’t tell her that it bothers you to hear about her with other people, but that you’re willing to understand as long as she likes you more than them. Don’t tell her that this isn’t the right moment but that there will be a right moment. There is not going to be a right moment. She shouldn’t have to wait for the right moment.

Don’t tell her that you can’t handle ultimatums, that you don’t like the idea of finally adding finality to your relationship — whatever still remains of it.

What you are telling her is that you want to keep her on as an option, that you are taking her for granted, that you want to know she will be there, that you can depend on her at the end of the day. When you find that no one else has stuck around or that those who have are less interesting, less thoughtful, or less doggedly loyal to you.

Doggedly loyal to you.

That is what she has been to you, for you almost as long as you have known her: a constant emotional crutch, the guarantee of stability, a safety net while you reachvout to grasp objects that sparkle and shine far greater than she does. All that glitters is not gold, haven’t you heard?

She is fire. You are ice, and you are afraid that her slow burn will smolder your cool, hard demeanor. That’s what has driven your decisions, your actions all along: fear. You are a coward. You are a hypocrite. You are terrified to let her go, but you are afraid she is too good for you, that she could drive you wild, that you would choke on her flames. That she is too much for you to handle right now.

Right now.

But if you choose not to love her now, you can’t choose to love her later.

alerting:

highowsyourlife:

MY FAVORITE FUCKING VIDEO

I LAUGH SO HAR DEVERY TIME

11 hours ago1,197,350 plays

I know how you feel Phil

I know how you feel Phil

oarsis:

The new super smash bros looks amazing

oarsis:

The new super smash bros looks amazing

amandaonwriting:

Happy Birthday, James Franco, born 19 April 1978
Nine Quotes
Sometimes it is painful to be oneself; at other times it seems impossible to escape oneself.
Always have one artistic thing that is pure, at least one thing, where you don’t compromise. You can do other things to make money, but have one pure area.
I don’t even like to sleep - I feel as if there’s too much to do.
They say living well is the best revenge but sometimes writing well is even better.
I’m a huge Cormac McCarthy fan and have read every book of his.
Make your characters interested in something. Striving for something. In need of something. Good at something. This will make them likeable and interesting.
You also need love. Your characters need to love something, otherwise they will be unlovable.
There’s a tacit belief that actors shouldn’t write books, they’re sort of allowed to direct movies but there will be a lot of skepticism, and they shouldn’t do artwork or music. There are these invisible roadblocks to gain entree to these areas for actors, and you kind of have to crash through those invisible barriers.
You want to be interesting? Be interested.
Franco is an American actor, director, screenwriter, producer, teacher, author and poet. His books include Palo Alto, Actors Anonymous: A Novel, and A California Childhood. Franco has also written, directed and starred in several short plays, two of which — Fool’s Gold and The Ape — he adapted into feature-length films. He wrote and directed the film Good Time Max.
Source for Image
by Amanda Patterson for Writers Write

amandaonwriting:

Happy Birthday, James Franco, born 19 April 1978

Nine Quotes

  1. Sometimes it is painful to be oneself; at other times it seems impossible to escape oneself.
  2. Always have one artistic thing that is pure, at least one thing, where you don’t compromise. You can do other things to make money, but have one pure area.
  3. I don’t even like to sleep - I feel as if there’s too much to do.
  4. They say living well is the best revenge but sometimes writing well is even better.
  5. I’m a huge Cormac McCarthy fan and have read every book of his.
  6. Make your characters interested in something. Striving for something. In need of something. Good at something. This will make them likeable and interesting.
  7. You also need love. Your characters need to love something, otherwise they will be unlovable.
  8. There’s a tacit belief that actors shouldn’t write books, they’re sort of allowed to direct movies but there will be a lot of skepticism, and they shouldn’t do artwork or music. There are these invisible roadblocks to gain entree to these areas for actors, and you kind of have to crash through those invisible barriers.
  9. You want to be interesting? Be interested.

Franco is an American actor, director, screenwriter, producer, teacher, author and poet. His books include Palo Alto, Actors Anonymous: A Noveland A California Childhood. Franco has also written, directed and starred in several short plays, two of which — Fool’s Gold and The Ape — he adapted into feature-length films. He wrote and directed the film Good Time Max.

Source for Image

by Amanda Patterson for Writers Write

patchesoftheuniverse:

the problem with reading a good book is that you want to finish the book but you don’t want to finish the book